Confusion

Beautiful morning following yesterdays storms. As I opened my eyes I could see golden light streaming through the autumn color of the aspen trees outside and smell the scent of pine in the gentle breeze coming through the open window. A whole flock of sparrows and finches made a pit stop in our tree this morning on their southward journey and the bird song from so many different types of birds was amazing. We had yellow finches, red finches, sparrows and birds I had never heard before. But the peace of dawn belied the storm going on in real life.

This afternoon as I sit in the waiting room at the radiation clinic I am contemplating the wacky dream I had last night. As my head hit the pillow I was thinking of paying the bills, calling the oxygen tank place to make sure we don’t run out of air for my best friend of 25 years fighting for her life with cancer in her lungs. Worrying that the cell phone was going to run out of minutes and I wouldn’t be able to make the appointments, which of course is a ridiculous thing to fret over since worst case all I would have to do is walk 50 feet to the neighbor’s house. But it is an amazing thing the kinds of things that whirl around in a stressed out person’s head at bedtime.

So the funny thing is that my mind apparently merged it all together to provide me with a vivid and exhausting nightmare. For some reason in my nightmare world cell phones had been converted to run on oxygen tanks and the huge increase in demand for oxygen had caused a shortage. So I was running around all night trying to find oxygen tanks so the phone would work.

But for today I sit in the waiting room in the eye of the storm with a few minutes of peace to write this blog, hoping and praying that this radiation therapy works as advertised. Praying that real peace will be restored to our lives so I can get back to the business of hiking and taking pictures.

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