A New God

There is a new god for our time, a god who would have you believe that up is down, down is up and that science and morality are on his side. Like all gods he demands unwavering faith in that which cannot be seen or felt. This god tolerates no dissent, there can be no disbelief, no discussion, no opposing ideas… only obedience. Disbelievers must be silenced by whatever means necessary, shouted down, publicly shamed, litigated out of existence, beaten or jailed.

Only this new god and his new religion are not new at all… He was the god of the middle ages when the world was flat and the universe revolved around it, and was the god of the 70’s when we were told in science class that a new ice age was coming. He was the god of the Spanish Inquisition, the guillotines the Soviet Gulags, the German concentration camps, the Cambodian Killing Fields and the ISIS beheadings. This god is the Father of Lies from the ancient times who’s many incarnations have all been based on lies. The big lie that everyone should be equal, that all lifestyles should be equal, that all belief forms should be equal.

Of course the world doesn’t work that way… some have more, some have less, some work hard, some are lazy, some are more intelligent, some are less. So then in order for everyone to be equal some must be taken from those who have and given to those who have not and rarely is the case that those who work hard are going to willingly give their assets to those who are lazy. Therein lies the problem, those in power must step in, shut down dissent and take by force that which is deemed undeserved by it’s rightful owner. And that’s when people die, up to 300,000 in the Inquisition, 20,000,000 at the hands of Stalin, 6,000,000 Jews in WWII, probably 2,000,000 more at the hands of the Khmer Rouge and countless more in Africa.

Now in America the big lie and even worse is being revived before our very eyes, with significant numbers utterly given over to living a lie. The lie that money can be stolen from the rich and given to the poor, that competition is evil and there can be no winners and losers, that men can compete against women in the Olympics and no one will think it unfair, that people who are unwilling to work should be paid a living wage, that boys don’t need a father, that teenage boys can shower with girls and nobody will notice, that a baby can be murdered on it’s way out the birth canal and that the so called doctors should not be punished, that it is moral to provide sanctuary for criminals at the expense of law abiding citizens, that our wildlife can be slaughtered to extinction with military grade weapons and the planet won’t suffer, that someone should go to jail for participating in dog fighting while it is legal for someone else to set his hounds upon a defenseless wild animal left starving for days while caught in a vicious leg hold trap.

This new alternate reality is simply not real… which of course is why there can be no discussion, why laws have to be passed to reclassify free speech as hate speech, why scientists must be jailed for postulating their own theories and solutions to problems, why lawsuits are filed to force people to adhere to another’s belief system, why college students must be shielded from opposing points of view, why a whole generation of our young are unable to deal with reality, hiding instead in safe spaces where they will never be challenged. It is why our God Given Rights, enshrined in the constitution must be continually eroded and eventually destroyed.

The words of the prophet are becoming fulfilled in our time, “…For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse, because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Professing to be wise, they became fools, and changed the glory of the incorruptible God into an image made like corruptible man…”. Of course the remaining verses of Romans Chapter 1 are an even greater indictment of our time… for those who can face the truth.

If we as a nation continue down the path of worship of this new god we will surely be condemned to repeat the mistakes of the past, which is always the final plan of this false lying sneaky god. Death and destruction are his highest achievement and he relishes in the suffering. But there is hope, also the words of another prophet of the one and true God, “If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.”.

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Dead Gods

I have to admit… I have been fuming since hearing the most ignorant comment on TV a couple of weeks ago about God that I have ever heard. You know the one, the comment comparing hearing from Jesus to mental illness. Speaking to God is OK according to the talk show, but hearing from God is a mental illness.

Sangre De Cristo Sunset

Beautiful Colorado Sunset

First of all, God is in no need of hearing from us. Our words and prayers He has already known from eternity and the Painter of Sunsets and the Creator of Everything is never unprepared. It is we who are in need of hearing from Him, Who was and is and is to come. He is our God, our King, our Teacher and also the Great Father to whom we cry out Abba Father. What good would earthly fathers be who only listen to their children without answering, without teaching, without providing guidance and earthly sustenance ?

In fact though, the Hollywood elites do not want to hear from God. They use their high places in society to pile up monuments to ignorance with their flapping gums at the feet of their dead gods whom they know can neither see nor hear, and are especially unable to respond to their foolish words and evil deeds.

People of true spiritual knowledge know that God does not often cross the Divide to speak to us directly. He has provided in advance all we need to know in the Bible, which we refer to as the Word of God. It is written, “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God and the Word was God.”. And also, And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth.” . We know that God, Jesus and the Word are all one, inseparable and invaluable to the success of a society.

Those with wisdom and understanding know to diligently study that Word so that when we pray for His will, His words that are already inscribed in our hearts can be called upon at the right moment to give us answers about the right thing to do and say. I submit that there would be far less mental illness if people would turn to the Word of God and away from the incessant chatter of the ignorant.

New Chapter in Life

Been house hunting for almost a year now and finally have one under contract. Financing is iffy though and I have been forced to document my sparse regular employment record. Apparently being a business owner does not count one iota when buying a house. th, 2015 when she passed… So there is a gap in my recent employment record which the loan guy is trying to explain to the underwriters who want some kind of proof of “my story”.

So as I fight to put turn the page on this terrible chapter of my life in this town, I am being forced to dredge up old records and remember the time when I had to downsize 25 years of marriage accumulation to a 21 foot camper in three weeks. Pretty much all the records along with everything else we owned had to be disposed of and I left our cabin with the shirt on my back, the pets, my laptop, the camera and some pictures and DVDs. I really wasn’t wanting to remember that right now. The pets were old by then, so in the last two years they have mostly passed as well. Only Maggie and Fonzy my two black and white cats, remain of the original seven critters who made the journey to the mountains with me.

Fonzy

Fonzy

But as a reminder that life moves on I noticed that some beautiful wildflowers have bloomed in the little cemetery out back where four of my four legged friends are memorialized with pretty quartz stones I found on the hillsides here through the years.

Dot & Puppies

Dottie all grown up with her new pups

 

Also, little Dot that I met last year has had a litter of puppies that I went over to visit yesterday. They are only a week old, eyes not even open and so tiny they almost don’t even look like little doggies! Well, the cutest thing… When I knocked on the door and Dottie saw me she started jumping up and down and screaming with excitement as usual, but when I stepped inside instead of jumping on me she turned aside and stopped and looked at me. So I went closer and she went a few more steps… obviously wanting me to follow. And she had a look on her face like, “come and see what I got!”. She took me right in to show me her new puppies 🙂 Cutest thing I’ve ever seen!

In the meantime I have had to go to work full time to qualify for the home loan and even though I’m fighting it there is an interesting phenomenon that I don’t have a name for yet. When people ask me what “I do”, of course I always say photographer. But when you work full time, the job consumes you, a person becomes what “they do”. You are either working, resting from working or getting ready to go back to work. So I’ve noticed that I don’t even feel like a photographer anymore and I’m taking fewer and fewer pictures. I still bring the camera along but I see things to shoot and I’m like… naaa, I already have one like that.  I also am having fewer and fewer ideas along with less and less motivation to continue. I am fighting hard against it but now I feel like an “unloader”, which is just a job, not even a profession and I don’t want to lose sight of my dreams.

Dot

Dot when she was a puppy

Well anyway, back to the point… I so badly want to start a new life chapter in a new town in a new home with new fur babies and new friends. A place where everything I see doesn’t remind me of some hardship. Perhaps then my inspiration will return, maybe this brief foray into the past will quickly be over and just a necessary step in putting a bookend on a lost decade with a whole new life in front of me 🙂 Lol… or maybe it is like the song says, I have a “Gypsy soul to blame and you were born for leavin’.”.

As everything from thirty years of marriage and my life as a software engineer was passing away, this verse from the book of Ezekiel often kept me going, and continues to as I prepare to start over again … Ezekiel 36:11 And I will multiply upon you man and beast; and they shall increase and bring fruit: and I will settle you after your old estates, and will do better unto you than at your beginnings: and ye shall know that I am the Lord.”. The verse along with Dot’s new puppies seem particularly appropriate 🙂

Steve Krull is a prolific sports and nature photographer selling prints and stock images online as S.W. Krull Imaging at various sites and agencies. Click this link to view all the products and services offered by Steve Krull and S. W. Krull Imaging. Additional services include, wedding photography, portraiture and model portfolios, and event photography. Additional products include fine art stock imagery, prints and gift items


Road Trip

Didn’t even feel like getting out of bed this morning, much less going out and doing anything… But after wrestling with my mind I finally made it out the door 🙂 Of course having doggies who need their daily activities attended to help a lot! Had to make a stop at Walmart to pick something up for a friend and after that we just kept on going… There is a secret place I like to take the doggies for their hike, no one is ever there and that suits me just fine

ThunderbirdFinally arrived at the destination and was getting the doggies ready to hop out of the back door of the camper shell when Son Boy decided I was moving too slow… Dang near knocked my teeth out with the camper door, while smashing my sunglasses into my face and then onto the rocks where they received a number of lovely scratches. A few exclamations later for which I have since made peace with God I noticed that a group of nicely dressed well to do people had pulled in near me and were looking at me with sad disapproval… Lol, but in my defense, Son Boy can be an asshole and though he looks quite sweet they were not there when he was dragging me face down for about 30 feet across the Walmart lawn, and I feel quite justified in calling him an asshole for today’s infraction!

We had a lovely hike to the summit of Little Grouse Mountain and the overlook onto the distant Collegiate Peaks and Sangre De Cristo Mountains. It was a beautiful cool cloudy day in the Pike National Forest and a magnificent day for a hike. On the way home I was tailgated by a Teller County Sheriff all the way to Florissant where I finally ditched him by pulling into the Thunderbird, a place I had always wanted to check out anyway. What a cool place it is! Sort of a biker bar in the middle of nowhere in the Pike National Forest, it is an amazing landmark and oasis that everyone should visit if possible! Well anyway, I also ran into a writer for the Ute Country News there and gave her my business card in case they might need my photography services. You never know what you might accomplish by just going out the door in the morning, a lesson I will have to keep in mind the next time I don’t feel like facing another day 🙂

It had started raining while I was there and I didn’t  get any good pictures, in fact it wasn’t a good day for pictures at all and I didn’t get any for my website either. Tonight it is still raining and I am just enjoying being inside enjoying some hot chocolate. It is becoming obvious that we have moved past the hottest part of the summer, the days are still warm, but you can really feel the Rocky Mountain chill in air on these nights lately!

 

Steve Krull is a prolific sports and nature photographer selling prints and stock images online as S.W. Krull Imaging at various sites and agencies. Click this link to view all the products and services offered by Steve Krull and S. W. Krull Imaging. Additional services include, wedding photography, portraiture and model portfolios, and event photography. Additional products include fine art stock imagery, prints and gift items

Turning Point

One of those memories from one year ago popped onto my Facebook today, it was a great memory of a great day, breakfast with my beloved cousin whom I hadn’t seen for too many years to even count. However the good part of that day was overshadowed by the memory of the rest of the day after I received a call from a friend who told me, “Steve, all hell has broken loose here.”, a terrible day in which several lives were irreparably altered, and not for the better. It was also the day that resulted in me having the two dogs that I wasn’t planning on or prepared for by any stretch of the imagination. However as you can imagine, these two beautiful doggies have worked their way into my heart and now they go with me everywhere. One riding shotgun in the passenger seat of my truck and the other standing on the console in the middle making sure there is nothing unusual lodged in my right ear or my mouth and nose 🙂

I had to take a part time job unloading trucks to make ends meet and it is a job that is physically difficult for people 40 years my younger. Unfortunately a few months ago I sustained a serious injury from which I have not been able to recover and is getting worse. Each day at work is a new lesson in pain and fatigue and I am sure I’m not going to be able to endure it much longer. And Son Boy is starting to look so sad when I have to work, like he knows. I hate leaving them behind, hate taking time away from writing and photography. And I have been praying “Please God, don’t make me go back there…”, pleading and begging the Almighty to have mercy on me and my little family of fur babies.

On the upside, the economy must be turning around, my stock photography sales have been picking up substantially. After years of terrible sales I have actually made more selling than I have working in the last few days… and I think that too is a sign that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Also I had a vivid dream the other night of a house in the country… one of those dreams that you just have a feeling is significant, a sign even perhaps. And after a long time of feeling repulsed by writing and out of inspiration for my photography, ideas are starting to come to me and the words are once again flowing onto the page… Every storm has to end and my storm that has washed away a home, a wife to cancer, a family, a career and all my savings and plans for retirement and almost everything but my faith, has lasted a decade.  It is a storm that I am hoping will soon be on the other side of the turning point.

“He maketh the storm a calm, so that the waves thereof are still. Then are they glad because they be quiet; so he bringeth them unto their desired haven.” Psalm 107:29-30

Broken Memories

Finally resolved an issue that has been dogging me for years… The question, is highway 67 paved all the way from Woodland Park to highway 285. I know I was on that segment, probably 30 years ago… fishing with friends near Deckers, way too long ago to remember details, other than 285 from Littleton and then some dirt roads down to the Platte. I also have another vague memory of driving down past Sedalia, through the mountains to the river and then on to highway 285 and back. I’ve been looking at maps for a few years now, asking people who live here if they have driven it, just wondering…

Western Bride.jpgNow I have the answer… well, the short answer is no, it doesn’t. Highway 67 makes a sharp turn at Deckers into the mountains and up to Sedalia. If you keep going straight the road turns into highway 96 and is paved all the way to 285.  On my way up the pavement to 285 I realized I had memories of that stretch of road… I remembered that we had photographed a wedding at a pavilion in the open space park along that road. Must have been 20 years ago.

Which brings me to my title… broken links. I don’t know if the same situation applies when you are old and lose your partner, or if it applies to anyone but me, but it seems like it would. When you are middle aged and your partner dies, the trauma of having everything you were planning, all your hopes, all your visions for the future and your entire way of looking at life taken away, it causes a terrible rip in time. For a while you can’t think about the past… the pain is too great, so you just refuse to think about it. Finally you are left with a distant past, the present and a gap that you haven’t  acknowledged for a couple or maybe even a few years… Eventually you have to link it all back together though, or you are left with a very confusing mess in your mind.

Well anyway, as I was driving past the open space I remembered the wedding… Bobbie & Susie, a beautiful country wedding. I wasn’t even photographing weddings anymore, Tricia had gotten in a bad car accident on the way to the lab to process wedding film and ended up blaming photography for years of therapy, both physical and emotional, and had quit helping me. I had to work full time and was not able to keep up with all the marketing and phone calls and I was tired of the bitchy brides anyway, so I just quit the wedding business all together.

But one day there was a call and I happened to answer it… The sweetest voice I had ever heard on the other end, slight southern drawl, maybe Texas. Said she had been referred and wanted me to photograph her wedding. I said I really didn’t do weddings anymore, but she persisted and the voice was so sweet… It was going to be fun, and there was going to be beer and a barbecue… The BBQ sounded pretty good and beer is always hard to turn down and I found myself agreeing to do the wedding and even quoting a very low fee.

Now mind you this was during Tricia’s recovery from the accident and there were no kind words coming from her towards me…. just constant hatred, she blamed photography for her pain and associated me with the photography. Naturally I became distant and not too receptive to her constant nagging, about what I can’t even remember. So I told her I was doing the wedding and she was welcome to come along and be my assistant like before and a meeting was scheduled. I don’t remember all that was discussed at the meeting, just that Susie was so sweet I couldn’t say no about anything! Lol… afterwards Tricia said, “Damn… she has you wrapped around her little finger doesn’t she! I’ve never seen you act that way around a woman!”. She was so sweet and so pretty, and of course Tricia was furious with me but maybe should have taken the lesson in the art of persuasion! Later at the wedding Tricia met Susie’s father and told me that if she had a father like that she might have turned out sweet too…  so my brief foray into marriage counseling and advice to men, if you want a sweet wife, find a woman who had a loving daddy 🙂

It turned out to be a wonderful fun wedding, even Tricia had a good time. And we remained friends with them for a while… Susie even came to my 40th birthday party. And now I have a few more pieces of that period of my life linked back together, by a stretch of mystery highway in the Pike National Forest 🙂

Steve Krull is a prolific sports and nature photographer selling prints and stock images online as S.W. Krull Imaging at various sites and agencies. Click this link to view all the products and services offered by Steve Krull and S. W. Krull Imaging. Additional services include, wedding photography, portraiture and model portfolios, and event photography. Additional products include fine art stock imagery, prints and gift items

Leading Indicator of Better Times

Before 2008 when the stock and housing markets crashed, there were indicators of the choppy seas ahead. My wife and I were involved in three businesses, unfortunately all non-essential to daily life. She had two businesses, mobile disc jockeying in the wedding industry and the online and physical sales of collectibles at a store we rented. I of course was a contributor in the stock photo industry in addition to employment as a software engineer at a major defense contractor. At least as far back as 2006 these once thriving endeavors began to falter… Now, ten long miserable years later, two of those businesses and my wife are  gone. She of course lost her battle to cancer and I was forced to liquidate her two businesses, which by that time were completely worthless and a storage expense liability only. And right when I needed it the most, the demand for photography was near zero.

large-line-item-1384383.jpgThe much touted economic recovery, mostly in minimum or near minimum wage jobs during the last decade has not resulted in an improvement in the business climate. In fact, looking at my print sales, it has been over a year since I made a real actual print sale, other than my mom buying gift cards from me of course 🙂

However, times may again be “a changin‘”, this time for the better.  The new year has seen a definite uptick in photo sales. I have always heard the stock photo business is a “leading indicator” of the economy. In other words, sales show the direction of business. When there is optimism and opportunity, businesses advertise. When they advertise they buy pictures for those advertisements. Another indicator of better times is a recent uptick in print sales. Like this one of the now defunct Rocky Mountain Balloon Festival, a longstanding Denver event which also did not survive the lost decade. When people are feeling confident about their position in life they spend money on non-essential things, items purchased mainly for enjoyment.

It is just a glimmer of hope at the moment that could easily be snuffed out by any number of natural and man made disasters but it is a glimmer of hope, something I have not  experienced in a long time. Maybe the good times are not “Gone for Good“, to which today I offer a toast to a promising future: For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11

Steve Krull is a prolific sports and nature photographer selling prints and stock images online as S.W. Krull Imaging at various sites and agencies. Click this link to view all the products and services offered by Steve Krull and S. W. Krull Imaging. Additional services include, wedding photography, portraiture and model portfolios, and event photography. Additional products include fine art stock imagery, prints and gift items